"My Self had to die first for me to realise that it never existed in the first place."
What happens when the self is defined by otherness? When it is, before being anything else, other?
I never fit. I always felt I never would.
My skin color was not right. My hair. My african name. My size. So I created a dysfunctional self. I was so other, that other became me.
I realised I was myself when I just did not think about my self. When we lose ourselves, we connect to the whole, the oneness. Some people lose themselves when they dance, when they surround themselves with music, some when they read or run. The self is suspended. Here disappears the need for affirmation of the self, being is just enough.
Oneness is a connection we can always go back to when we want to connect with the self.
Progress is only possible when the self that was making us insecure or anxious is being forgotten. When the self does not get in the way, we can recognize others as ourselves before getting to know them. We can sympathize and feel the pain or happiness like it's ours. We can finally stop giving the self so much authority, as this might be a constructed part of us, a projection of others, but never us as a whole.
We then stop identifying with its belongings, its transmitted values, its best sides or short comings, its emotions. We are finally capable to evaluate situations, with a distant appreciation and wisdom.
Because living completly lost in the self is passing by a huge part of life.
It becomes easier to destroy the planet, to use children to make our clothes or rape as a weapon during wars.
The cracks have started to show. It's only a matter of time now.